Gun-Crazy!

    One of the things that typifies the USA is the obsession with guns. Despite living in darkest New York City we've yet to go out a buy ourselves some handguns. I know what you're thinking: we must be crazy for not packing heat in this place.

    And you'd be right

    So we decided to take a fact finding mission and went to a rural gunstore deep in redneck territory and right across the road from a local church. The place carried just the kind of things that make special forces soldiers drool with envy. Cut-down machine guns for use from inside vehicles ("the kind our boys in Afghanistan and Iran (?) use"), night-vision goggles, and fearsomely powerful sniper rifles designed to target and immobilise vehicles. Rach inquired as to why they stocked this arsenal of destruction, but no good answer was forthcoming. The good-ole-boy behind the counter mumbled the words 'tactics' and 'tactical' several times and mentioned that he personally found the machine gun excellent for getting rid of 'varmints'. We didn't argue with the storekeepers, though - they both had automatic pistols strapped to their sides. The customers were also fantastic stereotypes, too. These guys were hunters who took things far too seriously, and had an ominous survivalist flavour to them. Their favoured method of transport was stupidly large pick-up trucks with even larger tires fitted, giving the whole thing a ridiculously toy-like appearance. Complementing these overgrown Tonka toys were the gun-toting hunters, decked out in full camo kit, combat boots, and crew cuts.
    But I can't be too hard on those guys since I went off on several bloodthirsty deer killing hunts, and you'll be glad to hear that the brainless deer have managed to totally outwit three grown men on multiple occasions. Both Adam and I had deer in our sights and managed to miss them wildly, which made Rachel and a couple of quadrupeds very happy. Whilst in the gunstore we did get to look at a bona-fide elephant gun and it's oversized ammo. He didn't buy it though. Pity. We need some thinning of elephant numbers here in Brooklyn...